As writer of erotica and romance, I work hard to include all the senses in the act of making love throughout my novels. Lying in bed this morning, snuggling with my husband, I pondered if loving someone amplifies the pleasure that comes from smelling their natural fragrance. I love my husband’s smell and prefer it over colognes, soaps and the over use of laundry soap fragrance. Go unscented! I could rant a whole blog on the over use of fake fragrances, but let’s not.
It could just be me, because I’m very olfactory sensitive, but I do think love changes how someone smells to you. Back in my twenties I remember how my ex-boyfriend’s smell altered as soon as we broke up. And in all honesty, I’ve wondered over the years how some of the people put up with their spouse’s breath and body odor.
There have been a few colognes that I’ve been fond of, but never more than my lover’s natural aroma. Most perfume (which I do not wear) and aftershaves make me sneeze so I tend to stay away from the stuff.
I do believe that as we’ve evolved, us humans, we have learned to rely less on our sense of smell. I think that’s a huge mistake. I can tell if my husband, or our cat for the matter, is stressed out based on their scent. Maybe we would make better love matches for ourselves if we didn’t douse ourselves with so many different fragrances. I’m not above it but I do keep it to a minimum. I use scented shampoo and condition and a mild smelling soap, but my deodorant and detergent are scent free.
I have known people who practically bath in perfume and their smell wafts toward you ten feet before they approach. To me it’s more like a shield than offering allure.
I, for one, could not have a lover whose aroma I didn’t enjoy. Sex for me definitely includes my olfactory system. My husband may say this is TMI, but I love the smell of sex. Such a turn on!
So back to the art of writing which is how I started this blog. When crafting a sex scene it’s important to make it very visual and easy for the reader to follow. For me it’s also important to include sound, touch, and smell which gives the setting dimension. At least for me as a reader, I have to get lost in the scene to get turned on and the more realism we can write in, the more easily accomplished.
So I’m very curious who else might have this experience with smell. Do you love your partner’s natural scent? Has that changed over the years? Do you like making love straight out of the shower or more like me, prefer it after the smell of soap has worn away?
I smell a story coming on. 😉 Please share your thoughts.