What Women Really Want in a Man

robert-redford-shared-photo-1181617560Here’s what I’ve learned from interacting with my readers:

  1. We want a man who is strong with a sensitive side.
  2. Romance us. We want a man who will surprise us now and again.
  3. We crave empathy and understanding. Put away all your tools for fixing things and just hold us and tell us it’ll be okay.
  4. Most of us enjoy a door held open for us and chair pulled out.
  5. We love you taking control in the bedroom but not in the rest of our lives.
  6. We never tire of compliments. Telling us we look beautiful never gets old.
  7. We crave your interest in us. Take the time to get know us. Ask questions.
  8. We want a man who is confident enough to share his flaws. We aren’t looking for perfection.
  9. Loyalty and honesty tops the traits most women look for in a man.
  10. We want a man that takes his time to learn our body. His excitement steams from bringing us to intense orgasms.

As a writer, I try to keep these wants in mind when writing a lovable character (Red in Stuck in Between and Stay in Bittersweet Deceit) without making them seem too good to be true. I want my male characters (at least in my romance novels) to be confident and relaxed, but willing to protect the protagonist at every turn. I also want my female characters to be transparent and bold about what they want.

The list above is definitely not complete so please feel free to add to it.

Warm hugs,


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8 thoughts on “What Women Really Want in a Man

  1. I want this list on a T Shirt…..in fact it should be posted on bill boards for all to see!
    You created the perfect man in MY RED (well perfect for me anyway).
    I want to find me the perfect man…preferably a hairy one!

    • Love you Serena. Thanks for the comment. LOL!

      Maybe I can make Sam’s love interest hairy for you! LOL! Tate’s Native American and therefore has little body hair but you can pretend his is a hot hairy mess!


  2. This is why my husband and I get along so well! He fulfills most of those attributes you have listed…occasionally he forgets to “surprise” me. He used to be romantic and buy me little gifts and send me flowers all the time when we were dating, but he has fallen behind on that one recently. He did surprise me with a ring that I had wanted–we were vacationing at the beach and walking hand in hand one evening and he stopped me and got down on one knee and asked me if I would marry him…again and presented me the ring. LOL! Some would say it was cheesy, but I loved it! :) He would do almost anything to see me happy! He is definitely a keeper! :)

    • Awesome Suzanne. I love reading stories like that. The ring was very romantic and not cheesy to me.

      Thanks for the comment,

  3. As I looked down through this list, I realized my Sir has pretty much every one of these nailed down. If I could add one, it would be that he worked as hard as I do. He makes far more money, but I work about four times as hard. Something about that just doesn’t seem right . . .

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