I’m not referring to the type of jealousy that creates stalkers and/or extreme controlling behavior but more your run of the mill discomfort.
Jealousy, like any other emotion, provides valuable information. Is the feeling trying to reveal to you some insecurity you have or is it providing a warning? Is it letting you know how much you care for a person and showing you your fear of losing their affection?
I’ve only experienced jealousy in love when I didn’t trust the person I was involved with. My husband is an incredible flirt and because I completely trust his loyalty to me, it doesn’t bother me a bit. It never has. (It’s kind of fun to watch too.) When it comes to other people’s success in book sales, I’ve definitely experienced it. My husband says it’s envy and not jealousy because I can be happy for them as well. At any rate, it’s not the most pleasant feeling.
Even though Jacqs in Stuck in Between and now Bittersweet Deceit is involved with two men, it doesn’t keep her from feeling jealous at times. For her it stems from insecurity and issues of self-worth.
A character yet to be introduced (don’t want to give anything away), becomes jealous when a younger man throws his proverbial hat into the ring. That can be somewhat romantic, depending how it shows up.
I aspire to write what motivates my characters in such a way that that you feel it in your core. As an author that elicits strong emotions from her readers, I don’t think any emotion is inherently bad. I think the avoidance of experiencing our full range of emotions is what can be detrimental.
What are your thoughts on jealousy, real or imagined?