Pussy Willow

As a writer, I happen to love words and it’s exciting when I learn a new one.  Some of my all-time favorites are flibbertigibbet (I love how that one feels in my mouth), oxymoronic, and conniption fit which is actually a phrase but also fun to say.

When it comes to the female genitalia, words to name and describe are sorely lacking.  For example, pussy denotes a weak man and cunt a hard woman and for whatever reason, cunt has become beyond a four letter word to many people, most especially women.  We are left with vagina which sounds rather clinical or crotch which sounds rough and masculine.

At least for the male genitalia we have phallus which is a strong, almost statuesque word, or cock which is perfectly fine and only denotes an overly confident man in the form of cocky.  We can live with that one I think.  Dick is okay but falls more along with pussy and cunt because an assholic man can be referred to as a dick.

As indebted as I feel toward E. L. James, I have to admit that using “there” to refer to the pussy isn’t at all appealing to me.

If you haven’t figure this out already, finding new ways to describe sex and body parts is a huge part of being an effective erotic writer and that is why this matters so much to me.  And if you have any issues with the ones I used above, hold your hat for far more insulting and scary ones.  Please forgive me in advance for some that I found online and have to share for the mere offensiveness of them.

Here goes: Bearded clam (That is disgusting on so many levels! Must stay away from all seafood references.), Soft Shell Tuna Taco (OMG! Rule two, stay away from any food references unless you are using cherry to describe the color of her inner folds.), Camel Toe, Slit, Pit (I could live with slit but it would have to be in context), Cum Dumpster, Fuzzy Taco, Beaver (eww, eww, and eww), Sweaty Love Box, Choochie, Snake Pit (Can you imagine… He forced his python into her snake pit. Blah!), Peach (Okay, I might have to have a second exception to the food list but only to be used in a romance novels. :) ), Holster, Snatch, Chonch (No, no and most definitely no. Well unless it’s a hokey western romance where he slides is revolver into her holster. Nah, I’ll stick with the no.), Tunnel of Love, Joy Trail, and Sex (The first two are bit too romancey for me but not offensive and Sex might be used in the right place although hardly descriptive.).

I could go on and on sharing words that are used to describe the beautiful, flowering entrance to a woman’s body and soul but I will leave you with a few that I like and a few I don’t understand in the least.  Maybe you can sort me out on those.

Explain these please: Arm Sleeves – I’m no prude but I’m not sure what this means? Is this a vaginal fisting reference? Cooter – This is a turtle.  How is that relevant?  Mace – Because it temporarily disables a man?  Please feel free to enlighten me.

Here are some that I found funny: Bloomin’ Onion, Masturbation Contingency Plan, Next to the Butt Nut Hut, Lovin’ Oven, Erection Correction Trench, and Velvet Underground.

Some that are not so heinous: Pussy Willow, Honey Pot, Cozy, Mound, Sheath, and Womanhood but honestly none that I could see using other than “mound”: He quickly pulled out his hard cock and came all over her mound. Or something like that.

Please share with me your words for the female genitalia as I am always game to learn something new. And you never know, it might end up in My Body-Mine. 😉

I hope your new year is getting off to a great start!

Warm hugs,

Blakely

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20 thoughts on “Pussy Willow

  1. Sorry it is about food for me…. cookie and when eaten by my hubby “the cookie monster” the name works very well….. I say it is a muffin sometimes. Maybe a moon pie. I actually don’t mind cunt bc if I am pissed off and mean to be one – job well done. They got the point. Also we have strong cunts bc we can take down a hard cock and birth a child. So I go with food or strength. Lol

  2. hmmm other, better names? I always wince at pussy. I think being verbal during sex is sexy but not when there aren’t
    words that generate seductive juices. So what words would I find seductive? Actually I’m not coming up with any right now.
    I’ll follow others’ posts and see if one catches my eye. Thank you Blakely for your candid, somewhat humorous article.

    Karen

  3. Like the saying goes, a man spends the first nine months of his life trying to get out through the meat curtains. And the rest of his life trying to get back in the vertical smile. BTW: Camel Toe refers to when her clothes are so tight you count check her pulse. The resulting outline is like a camel toe.
    And if you ever need some for breasts…well here is one I heard only at work, ‘Breasticles’.

  4. Meat curtains is foul beyond reason! Yes, I know about camel toe. :) It was listed on a few sites as a name for female genitalia.

    • Strangely, there is no male equivalent for vulva. No term covers the entire male genitalia except “package” 😉 but that’s not a medical term.

  5. Okay, when I was a youngsta, my mother taught me the proper names. Hence, i had a vulva and a vagina and a clitoris and labia, and breastseses. My friend called hers a “fur-burger” – always cracks me up!

  6. Dont forget Bacon Strips.

    Or Clapping fish.

    Or even a Kipper Mitten.

    Then again if she’s horny – it’s wetter than an Otter’s pocket….

  7. Okay late in the discussion but I have to tell you these are very funny, strange, disgusting and a turn on. LOL When I was younger, women actually had hair on their ———- fill in the blank. Now with the advent of prepubescent female genetalia on women of all ages, things and terms have changed. Like…runway to heaven. A little man in rain gear for clit and the slip and slide. I really like the balding of Amercan women. Ha ! Any woman who so chooses. And I must confess that going back to a bearded clam doesn’t have the same appeal as before. And as a result, I try to groom myself assuming that women may feel the same way. Maybe not?

  8. Great Post!

    Funny as hell too, but sucks for all us erotica authors who have to keep looking for “sexy” names…

    Up here in Canada, NOT used romantically, but “beaver” is a pretty common term….

    Other totally not-to-be-used-if-u-r-trying-to-be-sexy are:
    The Love Canal
    Baby Shute
    Tunnel of Love
    Fairway to Heaven
    The Pink Passage
    Prick Pocket/Cock Pocket
    Meat Locker
    Box or Squeeze Box
    Red Route (so gross!)
    Pleasure Palace
    There is another disgusting one that is on the tip of my tongue, just cannot shake it out, lol..

    Anyways, enough of that tonight, lol, should be trying to remember the sexy ones!

    ttfn
    Kare

    • Thanks Kare for your comment. Some of those would do nicely for cheesy romance which I’m not above reading. :)

      How is erotica selling these days in Canada?

      • With eBooks they can be sold from anywhere to anywhere, which is the beauty of it. Montreal however has one particular adult bookshop where one could always go in and buy womens erotica. Now eReaders have changed all that as women may conveniently and discreetly buy erotica! I have a post on my blog that talks all about it. Basically eBook sales of erotica is going to continue to rise.

        Please see : http://karenamontreal.blogspot.ca/

  9. Pingback: Whaaaaaat? Self Pleasure Over Intimacy? | Blakely Bennett's Blog

  10. This was an amazing article – I giggled and cringed the whole way through it. But it’s definitely part of a more ‘serious’ problem we erotica writers have – there’s just no accepted terminology – that doesn’t make at least a PORTION of our readers cringe – for the female sex. I try to get around it by pulling the woman into the front seat and describing her reactions to what her body is experiencing without using the words, but that’s not always possible, especially if the scene is being spearheaded (excuse the pun) by the male MC. I will definitely keep coming back to read the comments, but the only terms I use regularly are “her sex”, “sheath”, “mound” and “nub” (in place of the more clinical “clitoris”) which have all been mentioned already. I think I need to get with more f/f authors and ask them!

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